So January has come and gone…good riddance.
I’ll admit, for Minnesota, this has been a rather uneventful winter so far. However, regardless of recent events, I will never underestimate the ability of this place to become physically painful with little or no notice.
Winters here are never easy.
Now, I know you are thinking, “You are a writer, that should be perfect. Where else does the world itself force you to sit down and work because the alternative is far too unpleasant to think about?”
Ordinarily you would be correct.
In the six years I have lived here, (damn has it really been six years?); even when employed, this is always my most productive time of the year creatively. Winter induced depression + me + Minnesota = many dead, disturbed, and/or tortured sci/fi characters.
Unfortunately I am knee deep into month three without a working computer and as a result hundreds of fictional souls roam free of their fates.
This does not make me happy…
Working on paper almost feels alien after years of retraining myself to work on a computer, (yes I am old enough to remember the good ol’ days when a #2 pencil and a yellow legal pad was the creative media of the day) and creating via iPhone is almost unbearable.
Beyond just the ordinary cabin fever associated with living here, I now feel stifled creatively and all that energy I should be using to write is building to critical mass. So letting imagination take flight from this prison of boredom, I find my mind lingering on Logan’s Run, and living beneath the great dome.
Imagine it…Every pleasure in life available to you, and the only price to pay for this luxury is to voluntarily take a leap of faith on your thirtieth birthday.
My question is; if you lived beneath the dome, could the act of surrendering to the electric sparkling weightless trial of Carousel be a relief from a lifetime of routine and monotony?
I think the mindless repetitive nature of a life with seemingly no boundaries could easily become the same kind of hell depicted in the classic Twilight Zone episode “A Nice Place To Visit”.
You know the story; wiseguy bites it in a heist only to wakes up in world of unlimited dames, luck, and luxury. Heaven right? Or is always getting what you want as much a Hell as not getting what you need at all?
Don’t you think old Rocky there would have volunteered for the chance at freedom through change even if his death could be a consequence?
Hell yes he would!
I’ve got a decent life. Not easy, not filled with luxury but I have no real wants thanks in no small part to my partner. But at this point, I would gladly ride the lightning of Carousel if there was a chance of a Mac being found at the other end.
I need the glowing love of my electronic companion; to tap away lovingly at the keyboard as I fill up ream after ream of digital pages in my desperate bid to escape from anonymity.
A computer is my Carousel, a fresh start on the horizon every day. Lives hang in the balance, worlds are born and die as adventurers suffer the passions of their obsessions but no one will ever know.
The longer I go without it, the farther away from myself I actually feel.
Being poor and unemployed sucks…